And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
The walls in my apartment are so thin that sometimes when I fart, I stop to listen if people are laughing next door.
I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
I'm at a first year old's birthday party and a midget dressed as a cop just showed up. Word is we're going to toss and bowl with him. Updates to come.
Sorry I didn't call this morning. Ended up with a decorated war veteran last night who besides finding the enemy, KNEW where the fuck my G spot was. He gets a medal in my book!
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