what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
Want to FaceTime and watch me finish this bagel?
It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
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