I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
Today needs to die. The mail delivery guy watched me throw up in my yard while taking my chihuahua out in Christmas pajamas at noon. Low point in my life.
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
Nothing like sitting at your midterm pissed at yourself because you put your graphing calculator batteries in your vibrator and forgot to put them back in before the exam 😑
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
Randomize