new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
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