it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
I'm currently witnessing my drunk neighbor attempting to fold laundry on his front lawn. I think he's trying to spell out HELP.
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
Ok, maybe playing "whose family is most dysfunctional" wasn't the best drunk idea we've had. Todd''s been crying in the bathroom for an hour. We can't get him out...
Who the fuck watches Jessica jones and thinks I need to call a past fling?
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
Randomize