Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
Randomize