by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
I just realized my hands still smell like your cock. Which is awesome, but I wonder if the clerk at the store appreciated it.
I feel bad. I'm the reason hand sanitizer exists.
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize
