what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
Randomize
