Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
I don't care how drunk you were. Sending me a pic of your dick dressed as Uncle Sam with the caption "I want you" isn't an acceptable pick up line.
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
Randomize
