What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
I literally used, "MY VAGINA IS TOO FANTASTIC FOR HIM TO STAY GAY" as a valid argument for attempting to fuck my gay friend.
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
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