i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
almost dropped my phone in the toilet but it somehow bounced off my tit and landed on the floor. Boobs: saving me hundreds of dollars in bar tabs and smartphones since '09
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
I passed out drunk in her bed. Her boyfriend showed up and told me to go to the other room or we were gonna have a threesome. I threw up off the side of her bed and left. I feel like that was an adequate response.
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
Randomize