i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
Last night after we fucked, I washed my vag in vodka so I wouldn't get an STD
Or, you could have used a condom
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
I have feelings that need drinking.
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
Why is there a condom in my ukulele?
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