i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
Randomize
