You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
only if we run a train.
done.
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
BEST FEELING EVER: Standing in a hot fucking shower, while super baked, while eating a cookie.
You eat cookies in the shower?
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
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