why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
In other news, just had to pluck an ingrown pub with the pliers from my multi tool while sitting on the toilet at work.
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
Randomize
