i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
I tried to prevent a bar fight. By convincing a guy whacked out on Molly to slap the ass of everyone who was arguing and shout "WOO" each time. I'm proud, surprised, and intrigued that it calmed everyone down so quickly...
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Randomize
