he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
Randomize
