I am spending my child support on dildos
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
You poured a bottle of water into the salad bowl and said "bowls are a joke" and then poured it into your lap.
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
You did what with his pubic hair?
Randomize
