yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
I just made a moltov cocktail out of lubricant and a christmas bulb. The fire is still going strong. MERRY CHRISTMAS
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
Wanna tell me why vodka seeped out of the memory foam when I climbed into my bed?
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
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