Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
he is the anna nicole to my 90 year-old billionaire. i'm grateful that he's fucking me, so i'm buying him shit.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
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