I wish you were here to vomit in your hand.
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
If you're that baked in a class full of people that know you're that baked you tend to offer up a peace offering. Its like the burrito of trust! If eaten you are now obligated to help maintain my grades and keep me from falling out of my chair. $3.75 a morning is worth it for that mafia type protection!
It has become abundantly clear why you give me pixie stix when you're drunk now...
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
Randomize
