She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
My mom and sister were over. When my drunk roommate came home, he yelled "GOT BITCHES IN MY CONDO"
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
Randomize
