belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
I'm going to text my booty call and tell him nevermind, that I got the job finished by myself. That will teach him to text back faster.
This lesson is brought you by a psychology class.
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
I dropped her off at home and her fiancé was shitty, it was 4:30 am. I told him I was the Uber driver
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
Ah, Christ. I just saw a D lister I made out with once on a Rock Of Love rerun. Why are you asleep right now? Some weird shit is happening.
Randomize
