The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
Woman walking into toby keith concert: 8 months pregnant, black eye, shirt on that has a picture of a boot and the words "we'll put a boot up your ass" with an american flag printed over--the sleeves were ripped off and she had a camo cowboy hat. Greatest thing I've ever seen.
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
We're in ER. He's high on morphine and I'm drunk. Gonna score some bed pans for jello shots.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
Randomize
