id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
Trying to find a card for this engagement party. Can't find one that says "you met each other 5 months ago, cant wait to get the popcorn out and watch this one fall apart"
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
If Dr Phil has taught me anything about myself, it’s that I can seriously relate to those women who fake their pregnancies.
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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