I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
Thank you for letting me get drunk enough to forget he was there tonight, but not drunk enough to make a complete fool of myself.
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
The oven caught fire. I put it out, but called the fire department just to make sure it was okay since the smoke wasn't going away
You just wanted to meet firemen
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
Randomize
