IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
Thank you for holding my vodka while the police let me ride their horse.
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
So it turns out my dad calls his penis "John" which means he either named me after his penis or his penis after me
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
You were upset that she was flirting with your boyfriend so I thought the best game plan was to show her my boobs and get her to make out with me instead. I am the greatest friend on absinthe.
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
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