Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
Is today national text-a-girl-whose-had-your-dick-in-her-mouth day and I just wasn't aware?? I am getting the most random "just saying hey" texts ever and that's the only common denominator.
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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