Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
There are not enough shots in the world for this. We walked in and they shouted "the pilgrims are here!" And then someone handed me a turkey leg the size of my arm.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
think they'd let him outta jail for my wedding? we could have him back by like midnight....
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
Randomize