Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
I threw a hotdog at the security guard and called the bartender "goodlooking for a 35 year old who was rode hard and put away wet"... I would have kicked me out too
I would say "man cannot subsist on sexting and brownies alone" but I think it's actually possible.
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
I need to stop using "I went to the Harry Potter theme park" as my pickup line.
Randomize
