I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
I feel like if your cat could talk she would call me a cunt.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
how was your day?
fuck the small talk. are you bringing the liquor tonight or am i?
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
People don't believe me when I say the bruises are from work. They just smile and say "right." Trust me, I WISH my sex life was that exciting.
Randomize
