think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
When is the right time to ask your new roommate for her school schedule so she doesn't walk in on you fucking some rando in the kitchen in the middle of the afternoon?
Also apparently I made a "cake sandwich"--yeah smashed a massive piece of cake between two slices of bread....fucking tequila
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
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