He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
on the list of things i learned today that are not stripper poles: ex-boyfriends, table legs, and police officers.
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
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