I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
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