she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
It's 3 am and my parents just came up the driveway in a limo. They didn't leave in a limo. I'm scared to even ask.
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
I just told him he had gained a new brother. He immediately knew I meant the eskimo kind.
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
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