you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
At 4 am, making my walk of shame, the hotel security followed me to my car with his flashlight shined directly on me. I felt like either a criminal or like I was about to get raped. Can't a girl sneak out of a hotel room without an actual spotlight on her?!?!?!
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
We don't have any ice, so I'm using the frozen cognac to reduce the swelling on Abby's toe.
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
I HAD TO TAKE A SHOT OF JAGER AND SOME REDBULL JUST TO SEE IF IT’LL MAKE MY MOUTH FEEL BETTER
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
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