o shit let me call u back theres a hamburger in my pocket
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
I woke up on the steps beside a plate of spaghetti and a toilet paper roll ripped in half. And i actually think this day is gonna get better.
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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