I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
im typing and i feel like my hands are on backwards.
Stop texting me, I'm right here.
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
Tequila bombs in champagne seemed like a good idea at the time.
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
Dude, she found the red hair dye from 4th of July. then she proceeded to give you a red mohawk for a more patriotic thanksgiving eve. How do you not remember that?
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
all i tweeted was "emergency this is not a drill" and he immediately texted me asking if this was a subtle booty call…it was
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
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