Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
Three words: puerto rican gang bang
An ex-gang member just asked me out on a date via note. And spelled dinner wrong. Win?
you tried to scramble eggs in my dryer last night. i want you here in 15 minutes to clean this shit up
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
i awoke yet another morning with penis breath. ive been so generous santa has to bring me a shit ton of presents
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
When she gives birth, I'm so playing 'Eye of the Tiger'
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
Okay who let me pass out in a recliner cuddling a pitbull and a cardboard cutout of Orlando Bloom
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
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