Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
He dyes his hair, fake tans and lies constantly. What did you really expect from him?
A better fuck for starters.
his mom walked in while I was blowing him. he turned around in panic and accidentally punched me in the face. i have a black eye and only half the clothes i came here in. can you give me a ride?
My ATM looks so different sober.
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
Randomize
