break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
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