There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
Randomize
