K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
Just pretend you're riding a unicorn through space. Thats how I deal with the stirrup situation at the gyno office.
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
You may have gone on a date, but I ate chicken nuggets shaped like dinosaurs for dinner tonight. I think we both know who the real winner is here.
That's a beautiful sentiment.
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
Randomize
