Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
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