I've been at work for less than an hour and have pooped twice already. That's what happens when you start sleeping with your roommate and don't want to use the bathroom at home anymore.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
Is it bad that John just came to my work to have sex with me bc I felt bad that he slept on his porch last night locked out and I missed all his calls?
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
Okay who let me pass out in a recliner cuddling a pitbull and a cardboard cutout of Orlando Bloom
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
Randomize
