I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
Welp, I'm allergic to codeine. Found that one out the hard way.
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
Randomize
