do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
I can feel your judgement through the phone
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
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