Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
you probably have like 11 voicemails from us, one is us singing my heart will go on while were fucking
'Well you know, stuff happens' isn't really an excuse for sticking a cheeto in my ear
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
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