Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
Kicked off drink for Jesus month by puking in my mouth while talking to my priest...real cool
Your roommate was biting my friend last night. It was weird.
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
Randomize
