ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
Cops said there's a crazy dude with a mask in my neighborhood. Don't get stabbed.
If he was naked that was me.
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
Clearly I was drunk when I met them I gave them a muffin. But they sure remembered me
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
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